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Think About It...

This story is part of the new Slutty Shorts: Volume Two collection of short stories.

Jade from Think About It by Tori Hamlin

To listen to the AI audio version of this story, click the video below. This audio is NSFW.

Think About It

The call didn’t sound like a robocall. There was no slight pause after answering, and the silly, giggly, oh-so-pink voice on the other end sounded like an actual person. But Jade figured that a robocall was exactly what it was, and it wasn’t a funny one. No real person actually sounded so brainless and ditzy. And no real person would call and ask such a stupid thing.

“If you’d like to, um, hear a fact about tits, push one. If you don’t wanna, push two. If you, like, hang up, um, we’ll try back.”

Jade pushed two and hung up. The call was just one more annoying, objectifying, stupid thing on top of an already annoying, objectifying, and stupid day at the office. Already, the new guy, Lance had given her bottom a pat when she’d shown him to his office. Her boss, Mr. Barret, was his usual, demeaning self, calling her “sweetie,” or, “honey,” every time he summoned her to his office. What made this worse was that he continually interrupted her work for menial tasks that he could easily do himself.

“Could you fetch me a coffee, sweetie?”

“Would you take this down the hall to Jenkins, honey?”

“Could you put this reference guide back up on the shelf, darling?”

Jade did it, of course. He was the boss. Each time she’d perform one of these tasks, she could feel his eyes on her bottom or her breasts, even though her attire was completely office-appropriate.

At lunch, the text message came.

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about tits, reply Y. If you don’t wanna, reply N. If you, like, don’t do somepin, we’ll try back.”

Certain that one of her pig co-workers was playing a prank, Jade pushed N and locked her phone. When she got back to her desk, it was an email.

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about tits, click here. If you don’t wanna, click here. If you, like, don’t do nothin, we’ll try back.”

Now it was getting ridiculous. Jade clicked for no, then clicked to “report spam,” and went on with her work. She nearly cursed at her phone when it rang again near the end of the day and that same, silly, giggly, oh-so-pink voice repeated the question.

“If you’d like to, um, hear a fact about tits, push one. If you don’t wanna, push two. If you, like, hang up, um, we’ll try back.”

“Stop calling me!” Jade hissed into the phone. “Nobody wants to hear facts about… about breasts!”

She hung up and blocked the number. A new message came only moments later, from an unknown number, with the same goddamn message!

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about tits, reply Y. If you don’t wanna, reply N. If you, like, don’t do somepin, we’ll try back.”

Jade sighed and figured this was only going to end if she just gave in and let the voice tell her a fact about breasts. And so, she pushed Y. The reply came a second later, obviously a canned response.

“Fact: A girl’s intelligence decreases proportionally with the size of her tits. Bigger=dumber. Think about it.”

Jade muttered to herself and deleted the message. That wasn’t a fact. That was nonsense. But she couldn’t help but think about it.

Jade had large breasts but she didn’t think she was any less intelligent than anyone else in her office. Still, she found herself thinking about it throughout the evening. Before long, she was mentally comparing her breasts with those of other intelligent and successful women she knew.

Alice, the head of accounting, had relatively small breasts. She drove a BMW and was respected in the office. Brenda, the desk girl in the lobby, had large, round breasts that she showed off a lot. Brenda was always making mistakes and she drove an old Toyota. Carol, the VP of the company, had small breasts and drove a Mercedes. Everyone respected Carol. Jade had breasts nearly as large and round as Brenda’s, but she wore tight sports bras to crush them to her chest and make them seem smaller.

As she dwelt on this, she began to wonder if she was, in reality, trying to give people the illusion that she was smarter than she really was by making her breasts look smaller. Was the voice right? Was it really a fact? She went to bed that night, thinking about her breasts, how large they were, and feeling somewhat ashamed that she wasn’t smarter and more successful.

The next morning, it was another phone call.

“If you’d like to, um, hear a fact about tits, push one. If you don’t wanna, push two. If you, like, hang up, um, we’ll try back.”

Jade moved to push two this time, but she had a sense of unease, after spending all night thinking about her breasts. Maybe it couldn’t hurt to know one more fact. She pushed one.

“Fact: Every person is more interested in discussing your tits than hearing your opinion on any subject. Think about it.”

The line clicked. Jade thought that this was rubbish. No person with any decency would be more interested in having a conversation about her tits, than having a conversation of substance. It wasn’t a fact. It was a stupid prank.

But Jade thought about it on the way to work, as she drove her Toyota, only two years newer than Brenda’s. She thought about it on the way up the elevator to her floor, and she thought about it as she sat down to read her email. She thought about it when Mr. Barret called her into his office for coffee, and she thought about it as she poured him one cream and no sugar.

On the way back to his office, she paused and adjusted her tits, now even thinking about her tits as tits. When she brought him the coffee back, she decided to put the facts to the test.

“Mr. Barret, sir,” she said timidly as she set the coffee down.

Barret raised his head from his desk and looked at her tits. Jade blushed.

“Do you think that the recent downturn is going to have a negative effect on our ability to produce and hit this quarter’s goals?” she asked.

It was an intelligent question. It was a reasonable question. It was the kind of question that a valued and respected coworker might ask. Mr. Barret looked right at her tits.

“I’m sorry, honey,” he said, “what was that? My head was somewhere else.”

Jade blushed furiously and, rather than assert herself and repeat the question, or direct his eyes from her tits, she simply mumbled and left the office. When she returned to her desk, humiliated, there was an email in her inbox.

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about tits, click here. If you don’t wanna, click here. If you, like, don’t do nothin, we’ll try back.”

Jade moved to delete the email, but she paused, looked about, and clicked the link to receive a further fact about tits.

“Fact: Girls with the biggest tits and smallest brains are happier when they show them off. Think about it.”

Jade thought this sounded ridiculous. No one could be happier just by showing off their big tits. Just because she was a little dumber than girls with smaller tits, didn’t make her any less happy when she covered them up. There was no scientific basis for this fact, and Jade knew it. Didn’t she?

For the rest of the day, Jade thought about it. She thought about it so much that she had to stay over to finish an important assignment. She hadn’t finished the assignment because she’d been thinking about her tits and the tits of other women she worked with.

Brenda, at the front desk, was always happy. She showed off her tits every day in her skimpy tops. Brenda was popular around the office because she was always happy. As she walked to her car, she wondered about it. All that night, she thought about her tits, feeling ashamed that she wasn’t more popular and liked and happy. Her tits were big so, that should mean she was happier, but she was not.

The next day, Jade did not wear a sports bra. Instead, Jade wore a normal bra and left two of her buttons undone. The effect gave her just a hint of cleavage and, when she looked at herself in the mirror, she thought it did look just a touch attractive. Feeling a touch attractive made her happier. There was a text message on her phone.

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about tits, reply Y. If you don’t wanna, reply N. If you, like, don’t do somepin, we’ll try back.”

Jade replied Y.

“Fact: Girls with big tits don’t have to work as hard.”

Jade didn’t agree with this fact because she had big tits and worked very hard. At least, in comparison to say, Brenda. But Brenda’s tits were probably bigger and Brenda did have an easier job. They drove nearly identical cars, which likely meant that they made close to the same amount of money. Half the time when Jade walked by Brenda’s desk, she was doing her nails, fussing with her hair, or texting on her phone. This caused Jade to wonder what, if any, work Brenda actually did.

When she arrived at the office, her coworkers glanced more frequently at her tits. Her big tits that she was now showing off, just slightly. She should have felt objectified and foolish, she knew, but the pleasant nods, polite greetings, and people opening doors for her did make her feel happier.

When she was called to Mr. Barret’s office that morning, rather than sending her for coffee, he looked at her tits and asked her to have a seat. Then, she was shocked when he paged Lance and asked if he could bring a coffee down to the office.

“New look?” Barret asked as Jade sat across from his desk.

“Um, not much,” she said. “Just a new top. I should really get back to work, sir. I have a lot to catch up on.”

Barret waved that off and said, “Oh, don’t worry about that, sweetie. Just stay and chat a bit. You can get me that report next week.”

Stunned, Jade crossed her legs and listened to Mr. Barret talk about golf for fifteen minutes, while he sipped coffee delivered by a grumbling Lance. He discussed golf while he looked at her tits, which made Jade blush. It should have been offensive to sit there and get ogled by her boss, while he droned on about shit she didn’t care about, but it actually felt a little good to have his attention. It made her feel happy.

At lunchtime, she received a call.

“If you’d like to, um, hear a fact about your cunt, push one. If you don’t wanna, push two. If you, like, hang up, um, we’ll try back.”

Jade gasped audibly and almost hung up the phone. The silly, giggly, oh-so-pink voice had used the “C” word! It was gross and it was offensive and… and… and Jade found herself pushing one to hear a fact about her cunt.

“Fact: Girls who think about their cunt as often as their tits have more fulfilling dating lives. Think about it.”

Jade scoffed at this as she hung up the phone. It was ridiculous. How could thinking about her cunt lead to a more fulfilling dating life? But she thought about it. She thought about it throughout the day, as more coworkers stopped in with a kind word and a glance down her top. She thought about it when Mr. Barret left, patted her shoulder, and told her she’d done good work today.

Jade had, in fact, not done much of any work today, because Jade had been thinking frequently of her tits and cunt. But he looked down her top when he said it. The praise, the attention, and the fact that she’d worked less but been acknowledged for doing more made her happy.

That night, Jade thought about her cunt much more than she had for a long time. Jade didn’t, actually, think about her cunt very often. She masturbated, quietly, in her bed some nights, but in general, she didn’t pay much mind to her cunt. She, likewise, had no dating life, much less a fulfilling one.

That was mildly upsetting, she thought, as she touched her cunt and groped one of her tits. She had big tits that were making her work life easier and her life, in general, happier. Why shouldn’t she have a fulfilling dating life? So, Jade thought more about her cunt and she touched it. She also thought about her tits, and how big they were, feeling somewhat ashamed that they made her a little stupider than her coworkers.

Was that fact, in reality, why she hadn’t gotten more work done today? Was it because she had large tits and she wasn’t as smart or productive as the others in the office? As she touched her cunt and it got wetter, she decided that maybe it didn’t really matter so much. A girl with big tits, like her, could really get away with doing less and feel happier, just by showing them off a little.

And, strangely, when she thought about how stupid she was compared to the men in her office, and how happy it made her to show off her tits so she could work less and feel happy, her cunt also became very happy and she orgasmed. To test the theory, and because she’d liked cumming and feeling happy, she thought about showing off her big tits a little more, imagining the compliments, the praise, and the potential for a fulfilling dating life, and she orgasmed again.

The next morning, Jade wore a low-cut tank top under a blazer to the office. Instead of her usual trousers, today she wore a pencil skirt that ended just above her knees. She put on black stockings that matched the skirt and a pair of heels. Even though no one would see them, she decided to wear a pair of sexy panties under the skirt. The feel of the silky cloth between her legs made her think about her cunt, and when she saw the abundant cleavage in the mirror, she thought about her tits.

At the office, Jade’s coworkers were even more complimentary than the day before. When she sat at her desk, Lance even brought her a coffee and told her she was pretty. That made Jade blush, but not entirely because of the compliment. She blushed because when he said it, she’d looked at his cock and it was hard. She mumbled her thanks and brought up the report she was supposed to be working on. Her phone pinged.

“If you’d like to, um, read a fact about your cunt, reply Y. If you don’t wanna, reply N. If you, like, don’t do somepin, we’ll try back.”

Jade replied Y.

“Fact: Girls who regularly touch their cunt at work have greater workplace satisfaction. Think about it.”

That was ridiculous, Jade thought. Touching her cunt at work couldn’t possibly increase her job satisfaction. But she thought about it. She’d already been thinking about her cunt all morning and how good it had felt to play with it last night. She thought about her tits, too, though that was a little embarrassing because thinking about her tits made her feel stupid. But, when she put her hand under her skirt and touched her cunt through her panties, just to test the theory, the panties were wet and it did feel good to touch it again.

Working on the report was a little difficult because she kept thinking about her cunt and how it was wet. It was more difficult to work on the report with one hand because she kept putting it under her skirt to touch her cunt, which seemed to only be getting wetter. When Mr. Barret called her into his office to chat, he stared at her tits and complimented her outfit.

Mr.Barret, again, droned on about things that Jade didn’t care about, assuring her that finishing the report was no big deal. She could get to it eventually. He appreciated her company. It was only when she realized that Mr. Barret hadn’t said anything for over a minute that a further realization struck her. Her hand was under her skirt and she was rubbing her cunt. She was rubbing her cunt in front of her boss.

Jade quickly pulled her hand out of her skirt and held it up in front of her face, as if it had somehow betrayed her. This, however, only made it apparent to both herself and Mr. Barret, that she had a wet, horny cunt beneath her skirt. Jade flushed.

“I’m… I’m so sorry, sir,” she stammered. “I should go back to work.”

She made to stand and flee the office but Barret held up his hand and Jade remained in her seat.

“What were you doing, sweetie?” he asked calmly.

The words were out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

“I was thinking about my cunt.”

Jade clapped her hand over her mouth, as if it had also betrayed her, and stared, wide-eyed, across the desk at her boss. She was certainly going to be fired, and all because she couldn’t not think about her tits and her cunt. Only, Barret did not fire her.

“Well, don’t let me stop you,” he said, nodding his head. “In fact, don’t worry about that report. Why don’t you just go back to thinking about your cunt, and you can stay right here.”

Jade thought that this suggestion was wildly inappropriate. It was probably illegal for him to suggest that she sit in front of his desk and touch her cunt for him for the rest of the day. Only, now that she thought about it, it seemed like a much easier and more satisfying day than going back to her desk to work on the report.

Jade’s trembling hand slid back beneath her skirt. Blushing, she began to rub her cunt once more as Mr. Barret watched and sipped his coffee, as though she were some sort of nature show on TV. The wild cunt-rubber, she thought and giggled stupidly.

Mr. Barret put out his hand and said, “Why don’t you just slip those panties off and give them here, honey? I’m sure they’re just getting in the way of rubbing your cunt.”

He was right. As it was, she had to pull the panties to the side to touch her cunt, which was inconvenient. She stopped touching it and tugged the wet crotch out of her pussy, then wiggled the panties down her legs and handed them to her boss. He spread them out on his desk, where she could look at them as she touched her cunt. They were so wet.

A knock came at the door and Barret rose to answer it. Jade, confused and scared, pulled her hand out of her wet fuckhole. Barret paused as he walked by, took hold of her wrist, and guided her hand back to her cunt.

“It’s alright,” he assured her. “Go ahead and touch it.”

Jade, to her own humiliation, did just that. She’d been so close to cumming and all she could think about was touching her cunt again, putting her fingers in it, rubbing her clit, and getting that gush of girl honey out of it. Barret opened the door and let Spencer from sales into the office.

Jade turned her head and looked at him, instinctively pulling her hand out of her skirt again. Barret closed the door and stepped behind her. He cradled her head in his hands and stroked her hair with the other. Gently, he took her wrist again and, as Spencer came to stand next to her, he guided her hand back to her cunt.

“Go ahead, sweetie,” he said. “Go ahead and rub it. It’s alright.”

“But—“ Jade protested weakly, looking up at Spencer’s perplexed face.

“Go ahead,” Barret said again. “Here, we’ll make it easier.”

He slid his hands down the front of her top and lifted out her tits, then undid the front catch of the bra. Jade’s big tits burst free of the bra and she gasped. Spencer groaned. Barret squeezed one of her breasts and whispered in her ear, “Just keep touching it.”

Jade began to rub her cunt once more as Barret groped her tits.

“What was it you needed, Spencer?” he asked, as though he weren’t openly molesting a subordinate in his office.

“Oh, it… it can wait,” Spencer said.

“Say, you were at the top of the chart in sales last month, weren’t you?” Barret asked.

“Yes, sir.”

“Well, that deserves a reward, I think. Do you think good performance deserves a reward, Jade?”

Jade, thinking only about her cunt and the pleasure of having her tits squeezed, nodded her head.

“Why don’t we just let Spencer here put his cock in your mouth, sweetie. You just think about your cunt, touch it, and reward Spencer for a job well done. What do you say?”

Jade could only manage a slutty moan. She didn’t really want Spencer to put his cock in her mouth, but thinking about her cunt was far more pleasant than thinking about getting cocked in the mouth, so, she just nodded so Barret would allow her to continue touching her cunt.

Spencer needed no further invitation. Barret continued to grope her tits as Spencer pulled his very hard cock out of his pants and put it on Jade’s lips. She looked up at him through a slutty haze, her mind consumed with her tits and her cunt, and she didn’t resist when he pushed his penis between her lips. With his hand on her head, he guided his prick deeper into her mouth, pushing the thick shaft along her tongue as though she were just a pleasurable sheath for him to masturbate with.

It took Spencer mere minutes to ejaculate into her mouth, and as he did, Jade felt the orgasm coming. However, before she could have it, Barret tugged roughly on one of her nipples and she yelped around her mouthful of spurting cock. Opening her mouth to cry out caused sperm to leak from her stuffed mouth onto her exposed tits. Spencer, satisfied with his reward, put his wet cock away and zipped his pants.

“Well done, sweetie,” Barret said, stroking Jade’s hair and pulling painfully on her tits. “That was an excellent reward for a job well done.”

“I’ll stop back by later, sir,” Spencer said, flushed, and let himself out of the office.

Barret released Jade’s nipples and took his seat across from her once again.

“Why don’t you go ahead and touch your cunt again, honey?”

Wanting her orgasm, Jade thought about the sperm on her tits, but rather than clean it away, she resumed rubbing her pussy in front of her boss. For the rest of the work day, she sat in the chair, her skirt hiked up, and her fingers in her twat. Each time she was about to orgasm, however, Mr. Barret would interrupt her. First, it was a rubberband, painfully shot at her tits. The next time, it was another painful tug on her nipples. The third time was a binder clip that he put on her tits. That one also made her cry, but Mr. Barret just encouraged her to keep rubbing her pussy to take her mind off the pain. It seemed to help.

By the time lunch came around, Jade still hadn’t been allowed to orgasm. Mr. Barret, graciously, took the binder clips off of her tits and helped her to stand.

“Why don’t you give me your bra, sweetie? It will be much easier to think about your tits if you aren’t wearing one.”

That didn’t really make much sense to Jade, but Mr. Barret helped her by pulling off her top and helping himself to her bra. Jade, thinking more about her cunt than her humiliating circumstances, allowed him to remove it and put it on his desk next to her panties. He put her top back on and covered her tits, but her erect, throbbing nipples pushed through the top.

Mr. Barret patted her bottom and suggested, “Why don’t we go on a lunch date, and when we come back, I’ll go ahead and give you a promotion.”

Going on a date with her boss seemed a little strange, but Jade was thinking only about her cunt and her tits and having a more fulfilling dating life. Getting a promotion out of her dating life did seem fulfilling. A promotion and a fulfilling dating life would make her happier.

“Promotion?” she asked as Barret’s fingers slipped under her skirt.

“Yes. There’s not much responsibility and the pay will be good. It will be much more satisfying for someone with tits as big as yours, and a cunt that’s always wet.”

Aroused, confused, and desperately horny, Jade didn’t think about the implications of the new position. Instead, she only wondered how long lunch would take, and when she could cum.

“Your new title will be Head Cunt,” Barret said. “Doesn’t that sound so much better than… whatever you’re called right now?”

That did sound better because, right now, Jade’s job had no real title. As Barret escorted her out, Jade decided that she did feel happier, knowing the facts about tits and her cunt. The voice had been right, after all. Touching her cunt at work had led to greater workplace satisfaction. Her large tits, now much more proudly displayed, were getting her attention, and that made her happy. She would have less work to do now, and could, instead, spend her days touching her pussy. That, too, seemed much better than typing reports.

Yes, the voice had been right. She was going to be much happier, as soon as she got to cum. And, when she thought about it, thought about getting her orgasm, touching herself, it felt right. All she had to do was just keep thinking about it.


Enjoyed this story? You can find this and other tales in the collection Slutty Shorts: Volume Two.

  • Tanya’s Shrinking Tits: Tanya’s helpful brother devises a solution to the (fabricated) problem of his sister’s shrinking tits. [Humor, Incest, Titjob]

  • Chasing the Trend: Leah, always chasing the latest viral trends, is convinced by her friends that being raped is the latest fad. [Noncon]

  • Kimmy and Cupid’s Arrow: Kimmy falls for the worst guy in school, thanks to Cupid. [Holiday, Humor, Reluctance, MC/NC]

  • Julia’s Dreams: Julia becomes the family slut to follow her dreams. [Reluctance, Incest, Group sex, Double/Triple Penetration]

  • An Unnecessary Cunt: Kim loses her husband to her daughter, Erica. [Incest, Cuckquean]

  • Think About It: Jade receives a series of strange communications that have thinking sluttier thoughts with each passing day. [Hypno, Humiliation, Brainwashing, Workplace degradation]

  • Suck Pet: A DomCo Story: An origin story for the Korrupting Kayla character, Suck Pet [NC, Humiliation, Personality Modification]

  • A Night at Holes on Poles: A Toys Story: A side story from the noncon novel, Playing with Toys. Rebecca is forced to work as a stripper [NC, Humiliation]

  • Guidance Counseling: Jemma receives terrible advice about bullying from her perverted guidance counselor. [NC, Humiliation, Degradation]

  • The Genesis Crossing: An interstellar journey to save humanity lands Kiren in the position of a nonconsensual breeder. [NC, Sci-fi, Rogue AI]

  • Kimmy’s Lousy Luck: Kimmy has a string of humiliating bad luck on St. Patrick’s Day: [Reluctance, NC, Humiliation, Holiday, Humor]

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